Pictured above: Officer Matthew Droge,
Public Information Officer for the
"An officer could arrive on scene and be told one thing, but things just don't quite seem to be making sense."
Mary Todd is the director and advocate for the K-State Women’s Center in Manhattan, Kan. She completed her undergraduate studies in biology, fine arts and psychology and received her master’s degree in psychology. The Women’s Center focuses on raising awareness of violence and is a resource for K-State students who have been victimized by violence or threatened by biased, hateful or criminal behavior.
According to the Experts:
What is relationship violence?
“It’s basically treating another person as if you’re in charge of them in a very negative way. If you’re not happy and healthy and feeling completely relaxed and uplifted in a relationship, I would say rethink the relationship and find a safe and effective way of moving out of it.”
Q & A with Mary Todd
<<< Common signs of an abusive relationship?
“We are all so different and everybody reacts differently. Some people are very good at hiding that they are being abused and you would never guess in a million years that they were being abused.”
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Frequent absences from work or school
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Unexplained leaving events
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Always checking in with partner
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Needing to get permission to do things
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No access to money, car or cellphone
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Cut off from family
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Unexplained and frequent bruises or marks
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Anxiety and depression
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A change in them that they won’t explain
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Making excuses for partner
Profile of a sociopath? >>>
“The sociopathic person generally is a master manipulator…
What this person wants is to get whatever they need for themselves. They play on people’s weaknesses and they can also be the most charming and wonderful person.”
<<< Why do people stay?
“There is this strangeness to the whole thing, and I believe that comes from the natural human tendency to love… if a stranger did any of the things that occur in domestic violence relationships, we wouldn’t have any problem saying, ‘Lock ‘em up and throw away the key.’ But when it’s someone that you care about of course you don’t want that to happen, because you want them to change.”
How do you get out? >>>
1. Find emotional support.
2. Find material support.
3. Report to the police.
4. Plan and execute.
<<< How can you help a loved one?
“I believe in stepping in. I think we are our brother’s keeper, we are our sister’s friend, and we should step up and say, ‘Even if you’re not ready today, you may be ready tomorrow.’ I say step up. Do it. Be brave.”
Officer Droge Defines Domestic Violence
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@RicoDomestic
Do you need help? Call The Crisis Center Inc. in Manhattan, Kan. at 1-800-727-2785.